- If you find a bag of money at the scene of a drug deal gone bad, just leave it there and walk away. Quickly.
- If you think your neighbor's up to no good, don't break into their house.
- Any time a shy person starts dancing on tables at a nightclub, you should know that something has gone seriously wrong. (Like the movie.)
- You can't trust the government.
- You can't trust your doctors, hospitals, or insurance.
- Pain is often the result of love, but it's worth it anyway.
- The extreme difficulties of parenthood often stir up good qualities like responsibility and devotion.
- If you're an ex-super-secret CIA operative with amnesia, it helps if you don't forget your super-cool spy abilities.
- Don't go to public bathhouses if there's a chance you will need to fight for your life. You might still win, but it won't be pretty. Or easy.
- You can have a thrilling musical love affair without being disloyal to your spouse. That didn't come out right.
- Sometimes the nice guy actually wins.
- Don't ever underestimate what children are capable of doing or understanding.
Saturday, January 5, 2008
Things I Learned From Movies in 2007
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4 comments:
Here's my list (thanks for letting me use your blog for my "secret blog"):
* Stay away from Kevin Costner. And his movies.
* If you don't want to get pregnant, use precautions. Yes, it really is that simple.
* Recipe for if you are too broke to leave your abusive husband: meet a crotchety old man who has lots of money and no friends (except for you), then leaves a $200,000 check for you before he dies.
* NEVER eat the forbidden food, no matter how tempting, or you'll awaken your worst nightmare. Never. (I know it's from 2006, but still worth mentioning).
* Even whiskey-drinking polar bears can save your life.
* France IS better. Un point c'est tout.
* If you ever find yourself trying to out-swim a vicious dog that's trying to kill you, it's no use. Sorry.
* Finally, Spartans, don't let your boyfriend talk you into seeing an "historical" movie that's based on a graphic novel and uses blue-screens & CGI.
yeah, pain IS worth it anyway.
Josie:
When did you go to the School of Oneupsmanship?
Anon:
Is that you, Mom?
I am the DEAN of the School of Oneupsmanship! (Actually, let's just say I was INSPIRED by my pretty cool sister...)
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